thank you so much russ for posting the teaching and the prayer... God has been pushing me on this for some months!!!!
I just wanted to share something that I think may help other peeps too.... :) b/c I think this is pretty big for most peeps!!
in russ's talk before he goes into the prayer he mentions that some of us may have anger towards God which we need to deal with first before addressing the disappointment side of things..
i want to add to that and say if it's not anger you are feeling, but disappointment issue is tugging at you somewhere deep inside (huge sign that God is wanting you to deal with this)... and you can't figure out exactly what's going on or you just don't feel connected with it, it could be that (like me) you have a stoney heart to deal with first! hehe
When I saw the title 'disappointment at God' i instantly knew that this one was for me... like I said, God has been pushing that button in me for a while now!!
When I came to pray through the prayer and talk to God about my disappointment, I realised that I had come so far down the line that I had hardened myself against God and His promises...and my dreams.. becoming quite blah and 'whatever' about my pain and disappointment.... so before going any further I knew I had to pray a different prayer.. (thank you school of ministry for these life tools!)
I prayed.. 'God, come into the areas of my heart that are hard right now. I give you permission to unlock the closed parts of my heart. I repent for protecting myself against you and against being disappointed. And I choose to trust you and let you in again... You can go there, you can bring these issue to the surface, I give you full permission to bring up the stuff that I need to deal with. make me soft again, turn my heart of stone into a heart of flesh'....
and bham! the tears came a rolling and I was fully in touch with my disappointed, confused (little girl) heart that just needed her daddy to pick her up and dust her off and say, it's ok... you're ok, I've got you..(hmmm reminiscent of the words he spoke to me when i nearly drowned! oh how I need Him!!)
And then I was able to go through the disappointment prayer and allow Daddy to talk to me more about the things that are going on and that we've been through and show me where He has been through it all and what He is doing... and I became free once again to dream and to trust.
so yah... that's all I wanted to add... let's keep our hearts soft! KEEP ME SOFT GOD!!!!
still working on it... :)